Mood:  special

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd." I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friend tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.

As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives." He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!" There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.

We talked all the way home, and I carried his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play football on Saturday with me and my friends. He said yes. We hung all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him. And my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, "Damn boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!" He just laughed and handed me half the books. Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were seniors, began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the smiles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football scholarship. Kyle was valedictorian of our class.

I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak. Graduation day, I saw Kyle.

He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than me and all the girls loved him! Boy, sometimes I was jealous.

Today was one of those days. I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. "Thanks," he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began. "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach ... but mostly your friends. I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story." I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met.

He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable." I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.

I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize its depth. Never underestimate the power of your actions.

With one small gesture you can change a person’s life. For better or for worse. We were put here in each other's lives to impact one another in some way. Look for the good in others.

friends.  this touching story leads me into my letter of appreciation:

 

dear friends,

my heart is as large as the ocean, and you, my friends, make up all the land. our hands hold each other like the waves hug the shore, while i spend my days soaking in advice. a few of you have been my friends for a few months or a few years. countless hours spent talking and playing, laughing and crying.

our memories are sealed in big vaults, full fo gold. good or bad, they are still valuable, especially to me. i feel free to let go of all my worries and express my feelings.

no. not how i want it.

dear friends, 

my heart is as large as the ocean and you make up all the land. our arms hold each other like the waves hug the shore. i spend my days soaking in adivce. you all make up the lights to a path in the night - without you, i couldn't find my way.

playing in the yard, laughing at school, spending hours online talking; all the words we have spoken and written could fill an entire post office with letters of sadness, happiness, regret, sorrow and hate. we always have fun and have our disputes but i know i can count on all of you. i would need 100,000 pairs of hands to count all the times. as you all have been, i will always be there for you. i am here to give me advice and to listen. like always.

soon we will meet again in a little while and will be able to share our day. i wanted this to be short and sweet. a value could never be put on my gratitude towards you, or a price on our friendship.

thank you for everything, thank you for so much!

Mood:  sharp

recently, emotion has taken over my mind once again. explainable, no, but cool, uh, sure!

not only have i been frustrated with the own beings living in my town, also with those impatient in other parts of the world. i think i might have posted something about "all i really need to know i learned in kindergarten" and if i didn't, here you are:

share everything.
play fair.
don't hit people.
put things back where you found them.
clean up your own mess.
don't take things that aren't yours.
say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
wash your hands before you eat.
flush.
warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
live a balanced life - learn and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
take a nap every afternoon.
when you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.
be aware of wonder. remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: the roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.
goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die. so do we.
and then you remember the dick-and-jane books and the first word you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK.

pretty much sums up the world as we don't know it. people hit each other, and people don't look, others are greedy and some people don't play fair. there are thieves and there are people who don't wash their hands. some people flush but they clog the toilet (what good does that do anyone, it would be like not flushing at all.) 

i honestly cried when i was listening to my mother read this to me, there are so many reasons why humans cannot function properly, some are mental, some are because they can't seem to get it through that, it's OK to apologize - even if they weren't wrong.

if i elaborate anymore, i won't be able to speak to anyone, not even myself because sometimes, all of us do something out of line, especially out of the list. enjoy. 

Mood:  rushed

do you ever feel like your gut serves you right? i mean first off, do you feed your gut correctly?

advice on feeding your gut:

first you will need some common sense, not a whole lot, but some. next a boarderline case in which if you get too unbalanced, you'll tip the glass over. third an opinion that sticks, like peanut butter.

note: if you over feed yourself you may: look like an idiot, sound stupid, get fat, go insane and have problems to the point where you ramble on about how you don't have a problem after recently doing something destructive such as drinking and driving..

tips for the gut: make sure you are feeling okay. you're crucial in making gut feelings. if you cannot handle what is being fed to you, regurgitate it, or simply disagree. if forced to be fed something you do not like, use your karma and send some bad karma out.

Mood:  bright

if you could turn your bed into anything, what would it be?

i recently decided that mine was a big hole, when the lights are out, the room is dark, just like being dug in really deep. not only is it dark, but warm, the heat is just absorbed/bounced off the walls of this hole letting me relax and fall asleep. i can just claim that the spiders are worms and get on with my life, and usually i can't climb out because i'm too comfortable.

a smile a day will keep the sad faces away

[other version: a smiley face a day will keep the sad faces away] 

© 2008 caroline d. 

Mood:  bright

ok ok. juice boxes must be the coolest way to have a beverage, in the history of beverages. there are many advantages and like wise, disadvantages that come with these cardboard objects.

i love juice boxes. they kinda taste icky when they are room temperature or above, but when they are fridge-cold, boy oh boy, are they delicious. enough about my opinion, on to the actual idea behind why they are so great.

there are two substitutes that one arizona ice tea drink can come in, not counting a dry mix. a can, and a glass bottle. (it technically can be a genie in a bottle, except it doesn't grant wishes, except maybe if you're in need of using the lavatory.)  the other is a can, which comes in two sizes, but doesn't really affect this.

so there is this can, a glass bottle, and a juice box all on sale, all sitting on the shelf. the can says to the bottle and the juice box,

"i bet that i will be bought first, and my family will be the most successful."

the bottle replies, "i'm not so sure, after you have been opened you cannot be closed, i think i'll do the best because i can close."

the juice box chuckles and says, "of course the two of you will do worse than me. Can, if i drop you, you'll be dented, and possibly explode. and after being opened you can spill easier. glass bottle, you may be able to close, but if you fall out of that grocery bag, the miss won't buy your family because you break and you become a hazard to her children. i for one am the best, and i will be bought the most."

the Can could not resist his temptation to know the box's secret, "what? how are you better than me! nobody would want a silly little box with a straw for a head. ha."

the juice box explains, "at least when you get dropped you're ruined, and no fun. i can fall 1,000 times and be ok. these mothers love me, as for you're family, you're for unfun snacks where the kids have to be safe not to spill, or cut their lip. if i am dropped, i will not shatter to pieces, if i spill it will only be a few drops, and if i explode, i'll be the cheapest happiness. not only that, i'm delicious, my flavored is sealed twice as long."

the bottle so frustrated now exclaims, "if you're so perfect, why aren't you being bought?"

the juice box smiles mischievously, "i'm priceless."

a juice box can be thrown on the ground, and pounced on, just for the explosion of sweetness, laughter, and a never ending wish to here it's "pop". it make a great soap box boat because of the water proof lining, they are eco-friendly, when you finish drinking out of them, you can pump air in and out of them like a beating heart, or before you finish, blow bubbles through the straw to annoy someone. fill them with air and make the straw shoot out (don't forget to aim), stick the straw in the spot where you lost your tooth, do a magic trick with the juice staying inside the straw with suction, if you spill, it won't be the end of the three hour, five page packet of notes from your latest class, and even before drinking out of it, you can throw it at someone as a weapon, which won't leave a mark (for those worried about criminal records.)

glass bottles break, they crack, you lose the cap, they spill, they roll, can't throw them at someone's head, can't blow bubbles, someone may have used it to go to the bathroom as you went to make a phone call, you can see all the backwash, and things floating around inside too.

a can, three interesting things about cans you sometimes can stand on them, and you can play tab football (the game where you flick the tab back and forth and the person who flicks it off, wins.) lastly, you can get five cents back in.. MA, ME, VT, CT, and NY. but.. i don't live in any of those states, and it costs more than five cents to travel, those five cents are probably how much the gas station down the road jacked up the prices illegally in the past day.

everything bad: you can cut your lip, if you crush it too much, the leftover fluids seep out, they hurt, especially if you drop a whole case on your big toe, they are tougher to shake, and more prone to explode in an uncool manner. they sink when you through them in a river, they make a loud clanking noise when they drop and you have to buy a straw to allow its unripe nectar slither down your dry throat.

the downsides of a juice box could be, they absorb heat faster, sometimes they don't come with the straw on the back because some jerk decided to peel them off. when you go to poke the tip of the straw through the hole, the end bends leaving you frustrated, if you are sitting with some friends, someone may decide to squeeze the bottom and make the juice come out your nose (which isn't entirely bad for your audience) and maybe you're aichmophobic  (being afraid of corners or points.)

a juice box is not just filled with a yummy liquid, it an experience. 

Mood:  silly

if your past is in the side view mirror, are you in the driver's seat or are you a passenger?

take a mental trip one time while you're in the car, look out one of the side view mirrors while sitting up front, even in back works too. pay attention to the mirrors, just stare out at one for a while, don't think about what you are seeing in real life. you'll come to feel that you are thinking about the past, most likely something that recently triggered you. being in the passenger seat means you are looking to to either go back and learn about what happened, what ruined or changed the memory. if you are actually driving the car, you shouldn't really be thinking about this while driving, but, the symbol of driving away is your "proactive choice", whatever that's supposed to mean these days because its used too often for many other things. driving away does not mean you are running away, it means more that you are changing roads, and changing, like the clothes you are about to buy from shopping.

if you cannot look yourself in the eyes, through the mirror, it will show you aren't as self-confident about what you are thinking, and you may actually be running away from those problems. how to cure you of this? beats me.

Mood:  special

many people in one time of their lives so far have argued over happiness. there are many depths to which the debate can amount to as well as angles, there must be 360 degrees in the subject.

---

"Why do you think you chose swimming the English Channel?"

"It's sort of oldfashioned. People don't really do it anymore. And I guess England and France seem so different to me, so totally different, like sadness and happiness."

"Which is sad and which is happy?"

"Well, I suppose England is sad, but only because I think of people swimming from England to France and not vice versa. But the French do seem to be happier, or at least I imagine they are, what with the better food and weather and fashion."

"Is that what makes people happy: food and fashion and weather?"

"No," I said. "It's the other way around. Happy people make good food and fashion. If you're happy you don't want to eat potted meat or haggis.  If you're happy you want to wear clothes that make you look beautiful, not sensible shoes and woolens."

---

if someone is sad, they are less productive, aren't they? when someone is happy, they are in their up most best mood and are working diligently, so are you a happy or sad person?

Mood:  cool

a few days ago, i finally came into conclusion of publishing the website i have been thinking about for a few months now.

so far so good, i've been adding stuff since yesterday, and i made sure to create a blog, because it will suit the purpose i mainly had for the website - my out-there thoughts.

you'll be showered in good feelings as long as you think about what i have to say. if you just read it and expect something, you're wasting your time.

a few days ago, i remembered about the m&m story fletch wrote. i thought it was the most hilarious thing a while ago. around halloween, paige got the mini-m&m's for lunch, you know, the ones in the stupid tube with the flip top. yeah. so i was like "oh, guys, i have a story!" and began to explain what i briefly remembered. i said something along the lines of fighting m&m's, and seeing the strongest one, and completely screwed the story up, we weren't fighting our m&m's correctly. and i apologize poor specimens of food.

"Don't worry Trum, I'll help you out I'll share with you my secret to leveling and not dying. The first step to proper leveling is proper nutrition."

"Whenever I get a package of M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies, I put them between my thumb and forefinger and apply pressure. I squeeze them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red ones are tougher. The newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack food world."

"When I reach the end of the pack, I'm left with one M&M. This M&M is the strongest of the herd. Since it makes no sense to eat this M&M, I store it in a safe place. When my next tournament yields another champion, I breed the two strongest M&Ms and create a whole line of genetically superior M&Ms. I then eat these new, super M&Ms and become almost invincible in Tibia."

"I hope this helps you out buddy! This routine has never, ever let me down. Enjoy your new success and levels!"

for three days i've been looking for a cheap bag of m&m's and my mother came across a 56 ounce bag at costco for like, eight bucks.

current status of the contenders: mingling

favorite m&m: brown 

thank you fletch, for always being hilarious.